One of our neighborhood garbage pickup days is early Saturday morning. We always sit the garbage can out by the road late Friday night so that we do not need to rise and shine too early Saturday morning. Later in the day on Saturday we bring the empty can back into the garage and that’s that.
Here’s a phone conversation I had with my crazy old neighbor across the street this past Saturday afternoon.
(Telephone rings)
Me: Hello
Crazy Old Neighbor: Let me speak to Mr. Pop (Mr. Pop was standing beside me motioning he didn’t want to talk to crazy old neighbor)
Me: I’m sorry, Mr. Pop is busy now. Can I give him a message?
Crazy Old Neighbor: Does he know where my garbage can is?
Me: No. Have you looked up and down the street, maybe it got turned over and rolled away.
Crazy Old Neighbor: I have looked everywhere, it’s gone. Someone told me not to put my garbage can in a big black plastic bag and seal it up because it would be thrown into the garbage truck.
Me: Is that what you did? Did you place your garbage can inside a big black plastic bag and seal it up? (I wasn’t even going to ask why he would do that)
Crazy Old Neighbor: Yes! (Getting testy now) I must speak to Mr. Pop!
Me: Why?
Crazy Old Neighbor: I want to know if he knows the rules of garbage cans.
Me: (trying my best not to laugh) I can tell you that he does not know the rules of garbage cans.
Crazy Old Neighbor: You have been of no help! (He slams the phone down)
Damn! People can get mad fast if you can’t tell them what they want to know. If anyone happens to know the “rules of garbage cans”, please share them with me.