Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Questions from the home front

A quick couple of questions from the domestic side of life.

What the hell is that stuff that gathers on the top of my ceiling fan blades? Where does it come from and how the hell does it get up there and stay there with the fan going warp speed most of the time?

Where are the spiders that make the little webs that I find in the corners of my ceilings now and then. I see the little strands of web, but no spider. Where are those little rascals hiding?


Blogger FranIAm said...

The spiders carry mysterious objects to the top of your ceiling fans. They deposit them and then head off to the corners to spin their gossamer webs.

This is all done during the deepest dark of night, while the sky is inky and black and not a sound is heard in Casa de PoP. Shhhh... the spiders begin their industrious efforts so that they may be complete by time the sun begins to peek over the horizon.

Then they go to their secret and undisclosed location and rest. After they have restored themselves, they have outrageous gay sex parties with the many hypocritical closeted Republicans.

After all - with those spider legs, a wide stance takes on a whole new meaning.

Once their appetites for debauchery have been sated, it is off to Casa de PoP for another night of deposits and spinning.

And so the cycle goes, over and over and over again.

Please make sure they are not leaving any listening devices. If we do end up in Gitmo together, I will be the one in the bow bra.

(you would have to read my gratitude meme and comments for that to make any sense at all and it may not be worth the bother. that said, bear it in mind, as it may prove useful in order for us to have a Gitmo blogger meet up one day.)

November 27, 2007 4:20 AM  
Blogger fallenmonk said...

That stuff on the ceiling fans is the residue of lost socks from the dryer. Somehow it vaporizes and seeks out the top of ceiling fans and the coils of your refrigerator.
Those webs are not from tiny spiders but the nests of dust moozies from underneath the bed. If you look close you can see the moozie eggs.

November 27, 2007 4:29 AM  
Blogger Distributorcap said...

that stuff on the top of ceiling fans is Jenna and non-Jenna's dandruff. it is their dad' secret weapon -- keep America busy cleaning ceiling fans and they wont think about what a disaster he is.

as for the spiders --- they are hiding in Condi's helmet hair. that is where they get rejuvenated.

November 27, 2007 4:47 AM  
Blogger Sherry said...

when you finally do find out. please let me know because whoever or whatever is at your house stops by mine as well.

November 27, 2007 5:18 AM  
Anonymous scott said...

1. Dust. Since peninsula Florida has mostly sand soil as opposed to clay, I would guess your dust to be a combination exfoliated human skin, cat dander, dog dander, natural and synthetic fiber particles carpets and drapes, and decaying flora from house plants. All these things can become suspended in the air column and fall out on exposed surfaces. A static charge could be involved with the fan blades that increases the amount of dust that settles there, but that is mere speculation on my part.
2. I don’t know anything about the spiders, but you should probably keep a shotgun handy.

November 27, 2007 7:05 AM  
Blogger Randal Graves said...

Damn you Fran, I was going to comment about the feds using that stuff to camouflage the listening devices. Which is the truth, and don't let anyone else tell you different.

November 27, 2007 7:34 AM  
Blogger annie said...

It's the worst when the fan blades are white. Ick. We have an air filter
that also collects very scary stuff.
Best of luck.

November 27, 2007 7:44 AM  
Blogger niCk (Mem Beth) said...

The fan blade stuff - space dust
spider webs - invisible space spiders

It a tough job keeping the universe of our living space.

November 27, 2007 9:19 AM  
Blogger URBAN PEDESTRIAN said...

I had a clever answer, too, but after reading all the other clever answers I decided mine wasn't so clever anymore.

November 27, 2007 9:45 AM  
Blogger Forty Paws said...

About the only gross thing that Scott left out in his comment is dust mites: their shed skins and feces. Just makes you want to go clean those ceiling fan blades with your bare hands doesn't it?

November 27, 2007 10:50 AM  
Blogger mommanator said...

Scott-so TECHNICAL it's just plain ole dust!
Pop- do you know they actually sell dust covers for them which are replacable! I used them and they were sure gooky when getting down!
As for spiders- don't care if ya don't see em if there are webs there are spiders-hope to be the bearer of the news LOL

November 27, 2007 11:12 AM  
Blogger T&A said...

Ah... the mysteries of the universe! LOL!

November 27, 2007 11:13 AM  
Blogger dguzman said...

Fran's scary story made me cry....

November 27, 2007 11:13 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Count me in with the distracted. I can't compete with the range of answers here.

Instead I'll tell you that sometimes those corner cob webs could be used as disguises for other, scarier concerns.

For example in the corner of her living room walls near the ceiling my mother-in-law (may she rest in peace) had a black mold problem.

The room forever looked as if it need to shave its arm pits.

Cob webs would have been an improvement.

November 27, 2007 1:21 PM  
Blogger phil_in_ny said...

endust everything :)

November 27, 2007 2:50 PM  
Blogger Ole Blue The Heretic said...

The stuff on your fan is Pixie poop.

The spider webs are a diversion.
The spiders are making the real web under your bed. They will eat you soon and not in a good way.

November 27, 2007 3:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You need to blog more! Then you won't have time to look at the top of your fan blades and the ceiling corners in your rooms. I mean, really - who wants to know what's up there, anyway?

November 27, 2007 5:47 PM  
Blogger Josie said...

One of the urban myths currently circulating is that, during the course of a lifetime each human being, while sleeping, swallows eight spiders.

All that's left are the spider webs - spiderless.

November 27, 2007 7:43 PM  
Blogger Sparky Duck said...


The spiders are in your sink bathroom, waiting to jump out at the least happy moment

November 27, 2007 8:28 PM  
Blogger Jane Austen Jr. said...

I'm with ole Blue on this one. I've seen it happen.

November 28, 2007 5:26 AM  
Blogger Weaseldog said...

That stuff on my ceiling fan is known as a cat.

The old lady swallowed the spiders to go after the fly.

November 29, 2007 2:35 PM  

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