Damn, nothing happened
Yesterday was supposed to be the possible shindig of all shindigs, but nothing happened. With a date like 6-6-06 it had all the markings of the possible date for the Rapture. Man, I was so looking forward to that. What a colossal disappointment. What a rip.
I had envisioned all the fundies floating up to heaven naked as a jay bird. No, I had no plans to actually look up at all the assholes, I just wanted them to get the hell out of here. Leave and go to their maker. Leave the earth forever without a whimper. Just like that, gone and yea forgotten.
Those of us remaining would have had such a party. Gay people and straight people partying hardy. Environmentalist gone wild. Intelligent people would be free of the restraints of ignorance and idiots. Whooopee, we would have had fun!
But it wasn’t to be, I know because Ann Coulter is still walking the earth. She states that she’s a Christian so of course she would have been in the heavenly upward rising. She in all her nakedness floating away from us. Okay, I gotta admit I might have taken a peek at her to find out once and for all her true anatomical sexual structure.
So we remain waiting for the Rapture. The one that we were promised would surely come. It’s enough to throw a true heathen into a state of deep depression, isn’t it? If only the good children of god could get their wish, we could get ours. Are you listening god? Why don’t you do it, rapture them? Could it be that you possibly see them the way we do and you don’t want a damned thing to do with them either? That is so unfair.
I had envisioned all the fundies floating up to heaven naked as a jay bird. No, I had no plans to actually look up at all the assholes, I just wanted them to get the hell out of here. Leave and go to their maker. Leave the earth forever without a whimper. Just like that, gone and yea forgotten.
Those of us remaining would have had such a party. Gay people and straight people partying hardy. Environmentalist gone wild. Intelligent people would be free of the restraints of ignorance and idiots. Whooopee, we would have had fun!
But it wasn’t to be, I know because Ann Coulter is still walking the earth. She states that she’s a Christian so of course she would have been in the heavenly upward rising. She in all her nakedness floating away from us. Okay, I gotta admit I might have taken a peek at her to find out once and for all her true anatomical sexual structure.
So we remain waiting for the Rapture. The one that we were promised would surely come. It’s enough to throw a true heathen into a state of deep depression, isn’t it? If only the good children of god could get their wish, we could get ours. Are you listening god? Why don’t you do it, rapture them? Could it be that you possibly see them the way we do and you don’t want a damned thing to do with them either? That is so unfair.
posted by pissed off patricia at 4:40 AM
21 Comments:
Yup. God doesn't want them--and hell's afraid they'll take over.
Looks like we're stuck.
*chuckle* Who says the world is FAIR??
I would have loved to find out what sex (male, female, NEITHER???) Ann Coulter really is - just before her stick like limbs disappeared forever!! Bye bye Grasshopper - and good riddance!
PoP...I don't God could stand the idea of Ann Coulter eating cream cheese on a bagel while reclining on one of his clouds...
Hey, if you had a kingdom, would you want people like that taking up residence in it? I think not.
"...to find out once and for all her true anatomical sexual structure." Toooo funny.
Bumper sticker spotted on Michelle Malkin's car:
"In case of rapture, this blog will be unmanned."
Woohoo!
I waited all day for the fire and brimstone...jeez if you can't count on The Rapture; what's the purpose of life?
;)
I was sorta' hoping to see a thinning of the herd yesterday as well. Adding to my sense of disappointment we had to be subjected to more hateful bile from the blonde shrew with no shame. I can't believe there is anyone left who could take her seriously. I can only hope her "15 minutes of fame" are just about over.
Once it rains upwards, we can toss all those who deserve to go to heaven into that vortex.
For now it is pouring down, sorry - nothing I can do about it. That's god for you!
Greetings from znyhmoiu (my word verification)
Zee
Nymphomaniac
Yearns
Humble
Motivation
Of
Intuitive
Understanding
apparantely nothing interesting happened in 666 or 1006, guess we will have to wiat another 1000 years...
I did get one treat yesterday, Ann Coulter was slammed in an interview.
By all people, Tucker Carlson. It started with the same sex marriage thing, went to the flag burning thing, and on and on.
I thought Tucker was heart linked with Ann, a true conservative himself. He must be mad at her or mad at the President.
Coulter was tounge-tied. She kept saying things like: I don't know, you'll have to ask the President, I don't know you'll have to ask the Congress, I agree I don't know why the President did that, it was great.
The look on her face, like a deer in headlights, anger, frustration. I loved every minute of it.
It was not the hate fest I would have really liked, but it did satisfy.
Hi trl,
Buena suerta manana por la noche. Don't be too disappointed when the Dallas Mavs clean the Heats clock. :-)
yo soy Horsedooty!
I'm curious about Ann's anatomical structure, too. But take a peek at her/him naked? Not on your life, which the shock just might cost you.
That's your second great post this week, PoP. How can you be pissed off and still be so funny? ;-)
*snort* You've been readin' fairy tales again haven't ya ;)
POP: I heard that somebody saw Carl Rove's head turn all the way around (360 Degrees) yesterday.
That's easy. . it's not attached!
---------------------------------
RE: The Rapture (If it exists), most of these MSM and public official types that think they're invited will most likely be left staring upwards in disbelief.
I was disappointed too. I had my eye on the palatial waterfront estate of a certain TV preacher. I thought once Jesus hoovered him up, it would be mine -- all mine! But he's still here, along with his flock. Damn.
RE: that incarnate insult to the transgendered community, "Ms." Coulter, I don't think I would look up to check. I saw "The Crying Game" a long time ago.
The rapture can't come soon enough for me. The earth belongs to the non-believer!
You know, perhaps our Dear Ann is satan spawn, no?
I don't know if "nothing" happened...after all, Ann Coulter let loose her inner demon for all to see. What better day to do that than 6-6-6? Especially while she was pimping a book...or whoring..which ever may be...]
I can't help but think she smells very bad...
Sorry PoP, I had to cancel the Rapture again. I know, I know, I've been postponing it for two millenia now, but I swear, as soon as anyone qualifies for it, it WILL happen. I'm not going to get greedy: I'm not holding out for tens of thousands of the righteous here. I just want enough people to play a game of poker. Or at least chess...
Blessed Be,
- The Creator
The only way to deal with Ann Coulter is to either ignore her or laugh at her.
Thanks for the laugh.
Ann
On Coulter's gender...okay, I don't want t'be admittin' it, but I knew Coulter in high school. His name then was Bennie Pschollkowski...
I like the offer that the Rapture folk are making for their pets. See pets got no souls, so come the rapture, all the blessed go to be with jeebus but the cats and dogs get left behind, starving to death in the apartments, lingering in their faeces encrusted kennels. (why is god so mean?)
This naturally worries the chosen, because they love their pets even if they don't question why god would let them come to sticky ends. So over at Rapture ready, devout atheists or any non-christian can sign up to take care of all the pets. You have to promise you won't eat them or be horrible. Given that without god of course we have no moral compass so that promise won't be worth the paper its written on. Me and my Korean friends are going to CHOW DOWN on xian pets after the rapture.
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