Friday, February 02, 2007

If it’s Friday, it’s Fred the Cat


Hi guys, Fred the Cat here and I gotta talk to you.

I’ve overheard some pretty weird stuff regarding you human beings. What the heck has happened to you? You get weirder by the day, heck, by the minute.

This week I heard that a cartoon show wanted to do some advertising in some cities around the US, so they hid some toys. These toys showed a little light up cartoon creature on them. Okay no big deal, right? Well, for some reason these toys were suspected of being bombs and everyone went crazy. Why? Wouldn’t you think after they found the first one and saw what it was, the scare would be over? Well, a sane cat like me surely would.

You guys appear to be losing your sanity and your common sense. I find it funny and a bit ironic that you guys often use the phrase, “fraidy cats”. If this human insanity and paranoia keeps up, us cats may have to step up and give you guys some bravery lessons. You have become fraidy people.

I also heard that your country is in two wars, neither of which your country is winning. So what do you do? You consider starting a war in a third country. You’re in debt for the two wars, the military says their equipment is shot, and you want to start a brand new war? What are the people who will be fighting this third war gonna use for weapons? You don’t have enough people to fight the two wars you’re already in and yet you even contemplate a third one? Are the people who start these wars insane? Don’t answer that, because even an ex-street cat knows the answer to that one.

It’s times like this that I feel extra proud not to be a member of the highest order called human beings. You guys have the great brains, you have great abilities and yet you make some of the most stupid mistakes in the world.

So here’s your assignment for the week. I give it to you with love and hope. For heavens sake, wise up. We animals depend on you for so much and we care about you. How about trying to reclaim your wisdom, your bravery and your common sense. It’s really important now.

Have a great weekend!

34 Comments:

Blogger Coffee Messiah said...

All too true......have a nice, warm week-end.

February 02, 2007 2:11 AM  
Blogger COLORADO BOB said...

Here's a bit of good news for Fla. :

CRIST: JUNK TOUCH-SCREENS
Governor's paper-trail plan gets mostly good reviews

February 02, 2007 3:18 AM  
Blogger Peacechick Mary said...

Fred for President!

February 02, 2007 3:49 AM  
Blogger fallenmonk said...

Sorry Fred. The country slipped up a few years ago and lost its way due to unreasonable and unthinking reaction to an attack. Slowly but surely the majority is waking up and we can hope that the things that made us great will take back control of the nation.

February 02, 2007 4:11 AM  
Blogger Undeniable Liberal said...

Amen Fred. You and the Pops have a great weekend.

February 02, 2007 4:28 AM  
Blogger Felinemom said...

Fred, you are one smart dude. Bobby and I would share a can of tuna with you any day of the week.

signed, Ben the cat

February 02, 2007 5:53 AM  
Blogger bluegrrrrl said...

Dear Fred,
I have been trying to figure out humans for my entire life. I finally decided it was impossible. As long as my human keeps my food dish full and lets me lick her face when she's got herself all worked up into a tizzy, I'm cool. She thinks your advice is pretty awesome though...she muttered something about heading out to the streets to bang some pots and pans for Molly, whoever that is...sounds like fun to me!

You and your humans have a good weekend too!
Sincerely,
Stella

February 02, 2007 6:08 AM  
Blogger Sammi2u said...

Fred, Maybe you should take things over, lol I bet you'd do a better job than some ;op

Have a good weekend!

February 02, 2007 7:00 AM  
Blogger JBlue said...

Gloating again, Fred? Oh well, so would I, if I were a cat....

February 02, 2007 7:03 AM  
Blogger JM said...

Ah, but Fred... you are ignoring the logic that "the third time's a charm" which pretty much insures our success. Perhaps the problem here is that Dubya has assumed a canine point of view... living for the moment without any regard for history or the future?

February 02, 2007 7:20 AM  
Blogger Pursey Tuttweiler said...

Fred,
I think you should try to get this column published in a newspaper.

February 02, 2007 8:30 AM  
Blogger Pogo said...

Fred, you have much greater rinsight into the minds of American humans than most American humans do. Hope you and the American humans who you are training were not in the way of the storms.

February 02, 2007 8:39 AM  
Blogger Time said...

Hey Fred, don't worry the POPs will take care of you.

You see Fred, we have this egomanic, nut job in the Whitehouse. He lied to us and seems hungry for blood. He thinks he can force all people in the world, to live by his ideology. Fear is his weapon. Fear makes humans do crazy things.

But his power is dying, and sanity is slowly coming back to government. Things will get better.

February 02, 2007 8:55 AM  
Blogger The Minstrel Boy said...

yo fred, barn monster here. i agree with the whole fraidy cat thing. there ain't no fraidies out in this barn. no sirree. just the other day me an two of the girls had to face down a red-tail hawk that was after our babies. he kept swooping down and kept running into a buzz saw. minstrel finally came out waving a broom like a dummy. if he spoke cat i coulda told him that the bird only quit because he's tall compared to a cat.

February 02, 2007 8:56 AM  
Blogger annie said...

fred-my boy sunny has been a bit down this week. i think he's a bit worried about living out all of his nine lives.

but as long as pOp and others keep up the
good fight, we may come through this mess yet.

complacency is good, for cats. with humans, not so much.

happy friday.

February 02, 2007 9:44 AM  
Blogger 1138 said...

Just wait and watch Boston freak out when the new phone books are distributed in plastic bags on everyone's doorstep and at the end of each driveway.

February 02, 2007 9:47 AM  
Blogger Pursey Tuttweiler said...

Are you all okay? I am guessing that all is well in your neck of the woods but those tornadoes did cause me to be concerned for you.

February 02, 2007 10:05 AM  
Blogger blueINdallas said...

Fred, Are you, pOp and family OK?

February 02, 2007 10:08 AM  
Blogger vanillabirdies said...

Oh god people are ridiculous!

And that is a very handsome picture of Fred...Though is there anything resembling a not handsome picture of Fred...I think not.

Hoping people get smarter this year...

February 02, 2007 10:32 AM  
Blogger pissed off patricia said...

Yes we're fine. We were under tornado warnings today but thank goodness nothing happened. The front is just passing through here now but it is much weaker. It's been an anxious time. Pop will tell you about it Monday. Everyone is safe and sound.

Thank you so much for your concern. That means a lot to the Pops and me

Love,
Fred the Cat (she won't let me change the blogger acct to my name)

February 02, 2007 10:36 AM  
Blogger Old Broad said...

I was just gonna see if you're safe. You are. Good.

February 02, 2007 11:32 AM  
Anonymous RJ Adams said...

You want us to "reclaim our wisdom, our bravery and our commonsense," Fred?

I'm sorry, but that's just not possible while the country is run by foolish, cowardly, morons.

February 02, 2007 11:55 AM  
Blogger niCk (Mem Beth) said...

Right on, Fred

Those humans might have mighty powers, but they pay a high price for them. I wish they would just look to the cats and dogs and learn how to live. But do they pay attention, no. We just have to keep trying...... never give up.

February 02, 2007 12:23 PM  
Blogger PTCruiser said...

From now on, I'm coming to you for guidance, Fred.

February 02, 2007 4:44 PM  
Blogger Gort said...

Why does Fred have more common sense than many people?

February 02, 2007 11:14 PM  
Blogger Carol said...

hey, I like black n white cats. It reminds me of black n white TV.LOL!!

And hey, have a look at this
pet ecards

February 02, 2007 11:15 PM  
Blogger The Future Was Yesterday said...

Mornin' Fred, and I sure hope those high winds down there haven't ruffled your fur!!

Well, for some reason these toys were suspected of being bombs and everyone went crazy. Why?

Nah. WE haven't gone nuts at all. Your Mom and Dad haven't gone nuts, have they? Of course not.

But what is happening, is we have a nut we call "President" who thinks the only way to "lead" is with fear and intimidation. Remember that color coded "pole" that was so much fun to watch on TV? He called that our "terrorism threat level." Finally, when everybody ignored him, he quit using it.

But you see, we have this thing coming up called an election, and everybody wants to be Boss. The nuts that put The Nut in his job, are following his lead: try to scare everybody.

We ain't scared, Fred, we're just danged mad! So if'n your Mom happens to set your food dish down a little hard someday, she means nothing personal by it. It's just that it's so hard to watch this nut and all his lies day after day. So y'all go on and find a sunny ledge, and catch a nap. We've always been crazy: It keeps us from going insane!:)

February 03, 2007 12:14 AM  
Blogger Spadoman said...

I have opposable thumbs. I carry a sign.

February 03, 2007 3:37 AM  
Blogger BBC said...

Fred, it's like it says on my coffee cup.

"I'm surrounded by fuckin' idiots"

Sadly, SOMEONE, not me, voted them into office.

The five pussy's here at Polly's Honky Tonk Saloon and Whorehouse choose to ignore it all and leave all the worrying to me. It's a heavy load as you well know.

And I seem helpless to do anything about it other than fuss and do peace protests and such. And maybe drink too much sometimes. Gaaaaaa

February 03, 2007 6:55 AM  
Blogger C-dell said...

Friday already. The week flew by.

February 03, 2007 4:08 PM  
Blogger Snave said...

Fred, Baby Mackie here. I don't understand people very much, either. Snave told me to tell you what he told me, that there are some people in this country who are desperate to roll back something called "The New Deal" that was started about 70 years ago by some guy people call "FDR". Snave says the people who run the country now think that by getting our country into so many expensive wars, they can decrease the amount of money that goes to "New Deal" programs and bleed those programs dry. I'm not sure why they would want to do that, because Snave says there are a lot of people who depend on "New Deal" programs.

Snave also keeps saying something about how president Bush thinks someone named Jesus is coming soon, and that the president thinks he can make Jesus come sooner by starting more wars in some place called the "Middle East". If Jesus likes wars, maybe that will make him come see the president? I don't get it, but I don't think I would like to have Jesus come to my house.

People just seem to be really screwed up. I think that rather than trying to understand people, I would rather go relieve myself on the pile of plastic Safeway bags in the corner of our kitchen, or maybe see if I can get rid of this problem hairball behind Snave's favorite chair! If I do that, maybe he will pay more attention to me than he does to his computer.

February 03, 2007 11:36 PM  
Blogger PeterofLoneTree said...

POP, ol' girl,
If you get a chance, check out the article "Orlando Homeless Laws Stir Heated Debate".

February 04, 2007 1:08 PM  
Blogger sumo said...

Fred you are right as usual...are they still feeding you well sugar? You just let me know if they slack in anyway...I'll take care of them for you.

February 05, 2007 1:13 AM  
Anonymous oldwhitelady said...

Fred the cat, not only are you beautiful, but you're smart too! My cats are getting jealous!

February 07, 2007 5:26 PM  

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